Relentless
by Marawr
Summary: Excuse me, while I fall apart. Yaoi//. "Because words have the power to bind everything". Rated M just to be safe// Subject to rating changes :
1. Prologue

Warning: If you don't like Yaoi or Yuri, chances are you won't like this

© Squeenix owns the characters, not me, etc. etc. you should all know this by now. All I own is the messed up story line and a purple notebook of doom.

Rate: M Just to be safe.

Summaries are evil and catergories are confusing. Please disregard them both.

Oh, actually come to think of it I do own Kingdom Hearts, but not in the way I'd like to.

* * *

**Prologue**

**Scene I**

The light verged on darkness as the night pushed its way in. A loud _slam _sounded and two voices called a casual _so long _to one another. A blonde haired boy half stumbled, half skipped down the narrow concrete cement ramp and onto the side walk. His normally spiked up Mohawk flopped unattractively to the side, still dripping wet from the pool he'd just left. Right on closing time of course, and needless to say he was on a first name basis with all the staff. He had soft looking teal green eyes, his dirty blonde hair was almost a shade of brown, and could've passed as just that at night. Mind, it could've passed as black at night as well. His skin wasn't pale, but not dark enough to be considered tan. Another common trait of his was that he almost always had at least one headphone in, discluding when he was swimming.

He hitched his bag (black with a _Dresden Dolls_ label across the side, he was a strange boy, Demyx was.) over his shoulder, whistling a tune as he walked. "_Let's get these teen hearts beating, faster, faster" _he muttered breathlessly as he crossed the road, narrowly avoiding being hit by a car. He'd always liked that song; in the film clip they had fish tanks around their heads. Demyx liked fish, and he liked Panic at the Disco. Good combination, he'd always thought. Demyx liked music and he liked it even more when it was loud and it's because of this that everyone thought he would be deaf by the age of twenty. He was almost there (give or take a few years) and so far he still had perfect hearing... sort of. Maybe that's because unlike his friends (who only let screaming music touch their ears) he liked more theatrical music (even if he hated the theater) and for some reason held a strong fascination with _The Clash _and _The Sex Pistols_. But that wasn't his fault, he'd always claimed. Oh, and he liked sixty-nine eyes. He liked them a lot. He especially liked the one with the Mohawk.

Demyx looked upwards then; big metallic arches haunted the sky ahead. '_Just a bridge' _he thought to himself (he's a very paranoid boy for someone who claims to be so easy going, boy, he sure claims a lot of things) '_Just a bridge'_.

Just _the _bridge... Tourists had been pushed off of it once (or twice, or thrice...), pleasant way to show what a fantastic town he lived in. Of course, _he_ knew who did it (he was in fact quite close friends with said culprit), everyone knew who did it, no-one had the guts to step forward though. Just one of three of those pushed off (that _one _time) had surfaced the water below. But then again, not many people surface after falling.

Or more to the point, not many want too.

Demyx gave an involuntary shudder and forced the thought from his mind. As he shook his head clear he couldn't help but mutter a small '_I __**can**__ see the appeal'_. Once having reached the corner that turned off into the bridge he drew a startled gasp. A row of witches hat's closed off the bridge and it was completely empty of cars. He had gone over this bridge on his way to school; surely all the equipment he saw hadn't _just _arrived. After taking in all the random pieces of machinery with a small glance he shrugged and proceeded towards the pedestrian lane that went across the bridge, praying to god (or whatever it was he prayed to) that he wouldn't trip over in the dark, _again, _well, he was wearing his favourite jeans. He continued to glance around as he approached, only barely noticing the human silhouette, he looked back to it as though it were merely a footnote he had only just scanned over, then realized it might be important. Demyx stopped on seeing it and stood there, one arm holding his bag up, the other hanging loosely to his side. His jaw slackened a bit, expression shocked.

The silhouette slowly ascended the hand rail. One bar, two, three.

Be patient now, we've reached the top.

* * *

**Scene II**

The young blonde's eyes widened to full size, gleaming cerulean... and then, the silence commenced. Just for him, just for this one small insignificant being. Meanwhile, outside of his head, _everything _was chaos. His mother screamed eyes widening to the size of saucers as she raised her hands above the motionless body that'd been fallen across her lap. Orders called into phones and people ran for help. His sister next to him tugged angrily at her seatbelt, growling at it in attempt to make it undo. Someone unknown yanked open her door and leaned over to let her go, shouting at her to calm down the whole time. Larxene jumped out and strode to the sidewalk, her movements uncharacteristically calm; she sat down and punched numbers into her mobile.. The boy remained still, seemingly unaware of the stabbing pain now throbbing his arm, his eyes eased to a half open state again and he turned to look out of the window into the car that had met theirs in an almighty crash.

Opposite himself Roxas gazed at a boy in the back seat of the other car, a mirror image of his very own expression, that same polite apathy. He knew that boy. Roxas unbuckled his safety belt, moved across the seat and jumped out the door his sister had just fled from. He saw her speaking softly and frantically into her mobile, glancing up every so often and running a small hand through her hair every time she did. He turned and walked around his car towards the other boy. The redhead in the other car kicked open his door ungracefully and met Roxas in the space between their two vehicles. He had shoulder length red hair that seemed to defy gravity as it stuck out in random directions, making it appear longer than it was. His skin tone was light and Roxas felt oddly tan in comparison. The obviously older boys frame was slighter than his own, but he was far taller than Roxas, who had to look up to meet him in the eye. Those green eyes, they seemed to be on fire, even though Roxas knew that was impossible. Roxas' own eyes were sky blue and framed by blonde hair that hung over his face at random intervals. His hair twisted a bit as it stuck up into a few simple spikes atop his head.

"I know you," Roxas said slowly, accusingly. "You're Axel... Erickson... Right?" he received a nod in return. There was a long moment of silence before either of them spoke.

"Is he... um..." Axel's eyelids closed over emerald orbs. He seemed reluctant to continue and just stopped speaking, letting the sentence almost _hang _in mid air. Roxas blinked a few times, then finished the sentence for him, almost choking on the simplest of words.

"Dead." He said. As though prompted Axels' eyes opened again, they stared at each other in the eyes for a moment and then Roxas turned his eyes to the glass littered bitumen. His knees gave way and he fell onto them heavily, flinching as the glass ripped through his denim jeans.

"I'm sorry," he heard muttered from above. "I am _so, so _sorry," it whispered. Axel knelt too and, without a moment's hesitation, brought the smaller boy to his chest in an embarrassingly tight embrace, Roxas cringing as his arm was pressed against Axels' chest.

The streetlights flickered on as the sun vanished behind the horizon. They did _not _notice it, they kept their eyes shut and blocked it all out.

* * *

**Scene III**

_Close my eyes, _

_Move to the back of my mind, _

_Where worries are washed out to sea, _

_See the changes, _

_People's faces blurred out, _

_Like sunspots or raindrops, _

_Now all those feelings, _

_Those yesterdays feelings will all be lost in time_

The last line of the song skipped over and over in an annoying fit and so to fix the problem Saix threw a shoe at his CD player. Silencing it. He didn't like that song anyway. He had been jotting down some homework into an almost overflowing schoolbook (Still in the first semester and he already had so much work, senior year is a drag), his long navy hair constantly falling in his eyes, he ran the tip of his pencil along the 'X' scar on his face, it started above his eyebrows and ran between his eyes, finishing just below the two of them, he had soft features and pale skin, making him look all the more breakable.

Good thing he did shut his CD player up, because a moment later the doorbell rung out through the house and Saix jumped at the sound. All the while his CD player struggled to play the next song. _Shit _he thought, he then proceeded to repeat the word over and over again in his head as he jumped up and staggered to his front door. He ripped it open and muttered softly "Shit," he paused, ran a hand through his long cerulean hair and sighed.

"Sorry sir," he said clearly. "I forgot," he added, stepping aside to let his teacher inside. The man was older than Saix, his hair was about the same length and reached a bit past his shoulders. However unlike Saix he had his long silver hair pulled into a loose ponytail at the nape of his neck. His skin was a chocolate colour and his eyes glimmered with an almost golden appearance. And suddenly for some unknown reason Saix found himself feeling very self conscious. But it definitely wasn't because the man was taller, more muscular and better looking than him. Oh god no, he wasn't superficial.

"Your parents home?" the man inquired, lifting his head up a bit and glancing around. Saix shook his head, _no_, pretty blue hair swishing in every which way.

"Are they ever?" Saix added in a bored tone just for good measure. Xemnas smiled at him.

--_Go on, just endure it, what's one more little sympathetic smile? Nothing, it's nothing, c'mon Saix, keep it together. _

"Sir, I was wondering--" Saix began, plopping down onto his sofa.

"Don't call me that, it makes me feel old." Xemnas' mouth pulled down a bit into what looked distinctively like a pout. '_How strange' _Said mused to himself, a smile tempted to grace his features.

"Twenty-six is old si--" he cleared his throat before correcting himself, "-Xemnas... I was wondering what books I'll need for this evening?"

"Not sure," Xemnas said, dropping down beside the younger male. "Anything in particular you need a hand in?"

"Eh, not really." he said non-commitingly, only barely noticing as the others teeth started nipping at the flesh of his neck. Impatient bastard, no wonder Saix's grades were slipping. "I do have a--" his breath caught for a moment. "A biology exam on Thursday,"

"Yeah? What about?" he questioned, sending a shiver through the blue haired boys' frame.

"Ana-" he started, but had to pause, drawing in a sharp breath. Xemnas smirked into the pale flesh of Saix's neck. "Anatomy,"

"Really?" he asked, trailing his lips up to the younger male's jaw line. "I can teach you _a lot_ about anatomy."

And the CD player started to hum again.

_**When the shirt came off, it was all in time**_

_When a m-m-m-minute turned into a mile_

_And then I broke that grin, and I cut it out_

_**And you got all turned on by the taste of your sin**_

_When I mention blue, all you thought was colour_

_When you mention drugs, all I thought was sober_

_**When your pants came off and I turned you over**_

_When you mention blue_

* * *

**A/N**

First chapter, these are the three main pairings. But there will be several side pairings. Lot's of 'em. But they aren't nearly as important.

Sorry if the age thing between Saix and Xemnas freak you out, in all fairness, Saix is in his senior year, he'll be of age... soon.

Edited by Dan, thanks heaps.(_Dan says sorry if is editing sucks, he's having some problems with concentration at the moment_.)

**Please Review. **

**Words have to power to bind everything**


	2. Morphine

i've got a hopeless crush

_I've got a hopeless crush  
Maybe that don't mean much to you  
But, I'm hoping this can keep going  
Madi, dear, can't we just disappear  
And take our chances  
On a teenagers' romances?  
Put our money where our mouth is_

A timer buzzed loudly, at almost the precise time that the house phone began to ring.

"Kairi!" A pale, thin, blonde girl called into the other room.

"What?" A voice called back. It sounded _rounder, _than the blonde girl's voice had. More happy and boppy, maybe.

"Quick, come get the phone," Naminè's voice contorted as she snapped this. She sounded like a mother when her child started screaming in the middle of a shopping centre. Not pleasant at all. She heard a groan, a few muttered words then quick feet padding their way into the kitchen, a girl with short red hair and tan skin hopped in. Naminè threw the timer at the floor, it stopped ringing. She pulled open the oven, calming down and slid a tray of cookies out of it. Just over the blare of the TV room and Sora and Riku talking loudly and animatedly the clock chimed six times.

"Hello, Kairi speaking," Kairi said in a faux happy voice. Her twin trotted over too her, blowing on a biscuit to cool it down enough to eat. "Who's thi- Oh," she adopted an uninterested expression. "It's your stalker," she said lightly, handing the phone to Naminè, who had just at that moment taken a huge mouthful of cookie.

"Phelloff?" she asked into the phone before swallowing hard. "Larxene?" she said now, more clearly.

"_Naminè? Nami, there was a big fucking noise, and then there was another big noise, and so I panicked and fucking, Roxas got his arms all cut up by the glass, he's like collapsed now, with some random from the other car, I think he's your step brother actually but that's not important." _She paused for a moment "_and like, after everything fucked up, I jumped out of the car and fucking didn't know what to do._" She stopped for a moment, laughing, in a very forced and almost hollow way. "_Dad's f-f-fucking dead._" She said finally, shaking voice catching on the 'f'.

Naminè stood there and blinked a few times.

"Sorry, what happened?"

"_Car. Crash. Roxas collapsed. My dad," _she drew in a sharp shaky breath. "_Died, then I called you,"_

"Thank you," Naminè said, jumping as Riku's mobile starting ringing on the kitchen table. "Where are you?"

"_Corner of fifth and Avendale, near Brentwood_" Larxene replied, Naminè took Riku's phone and tossed it at the couch which Riku occupied.

"Tah Nami!" he called to her.

"Is there an ambulance?"

"_There will be soon,"_

"Take Roxas, and I will meet you at the hospital, I'll bring you some cookies and everything,"

There was a short pause. "_Really?"_

"Uh-huh" Naminè spoke softly. Covering the mouth piece afterwards as Riku shouted something into his phone.

"'_Kay_" said the other.

"You have to hang up now,"

There was a short pause, and then Larxene did what she was told. Naminè couldn't remember that ever having happened before.

_(Hey!) Us kids know  
(Hey!) No cars go  
Where we know  
Between the click of the light and the start of the dream_

The slate haired boy slipped over the top bar of the hand rail. And then, Demyx recognized him.

Not grasping what was happening he shouted: "Hey! Zexion!" as loudly as he could.

The other boy, whose fringe fell over the side of his face, covering one eye, looked over at him. Expression ever so startled. After a moment of quick thinking he waved heartily and sat down quickly on the bar. He grinned over at Demyx, his subconscious registering that the sandy blonde boy had just technically saved his life; meanwhile his other (not-so-sub) subconscious was shouting "_YOU FUCKING RUINED MY DEATH!"_

Demyx jogged over to him, dropped his backpack to the cement and clambered up the handrails to sit next to his classmate, one year his senior. He sat next to the other, far past the point of "personal space" and Zexion found himself fighting the urge to push Demyx off the bridge and into the murky water swirling beneath them.

"What up, Zexy," he said happily, further pushing the other to the brink of homicide with the use of the nickname 'Zexy'. Zexion shuddered and scooted away from Demyx a bit, who without thinking slid down next to him again.

"Nothing," he said softly.

"I've just been swimming,"

"Yes, I assumed you had," he responded, tugging suggestively at Demyx's wet hair, he got a lovely dose of wet, slick hair gel on his fingers because of it. At least, he hoped it was hair gel. Oh god.

"Oh, haha," Demyx laughed, he had a strange laugh, Zexion decided, he hadn't realized before, but it was so distinct. "Wanna headphone?" Demyx asked, offering the unused earpiece.

"No than-" he began

"Of course you do, who doesn't love punk cabaret? Right Zex-ohhhh," he said shoving the bud into the others pale fingertips. Zexion sighed but placed it in anyway. They sat there a while listening to the wailing music, then Demyx spoke up again. "So, how's Ienzo?" he asked, referring to Zexion's elder brother who'd taught Demyx to play guitar.

Zexion looked at him awkwardly, then at his watch. "Well as of about five minutes ago. He's dead. We made this promise y'see," said Zexion, putting on a sarcastic provoking voice, but at the same time, lowering it to a whisper. "And then you, Demyx, interrupted me, just as I was about to fulfill that promise."

Demyx looked confused.

"What are you talking about?"

Zexion tapped his nose wisely, and pulled out the earpiece. The silver haired boy spun around, hopping with surprising grace back onto the bridge.

"Do you see Demyx? Even in death I fail," he said, pausing a moment before running full speed away from the still confused Demyx, shouting "catch ya later," just as he reached the end of the bridge.

_This is the scent of dead skin on a linoleum floor  
This is the scent of quarantine wings in a hospital  
It's not so pleasant  
And it's not so conventional  
It sure as hell ain't normal  
But we deal, we deal_

When Roxas woke up he was lying in a white bed, the walls were white, the linoleum on the floor was white, the benches where white, the fans, the lights, the carpet, all white, even the freaking painting on the wall was of snowy mountains, it burnt his eyes. He sat up and yawned loudly, which hurt more than it should have. Ahead of him sitting on two armchairs were two males about his age, that Axel boy and a silver haired teen who'd hitched a ride with Naminè, but for a different reason.

On the bed next to Roxas was a boy with the same colour hair as Riku, only much longer and without a fringe, or rather, it was so long that it slid behind his ear easily.

Axel sat, legs pulled up to his chest in his armchair and Riku talking softly into his mobile. He glanced at Roxas and said something about having no credit. He closed his phone.

"Your Sora's cousin… right?"

Roxas opened his mouth to agree, but no sound came out so he just nodded.

Axel looked at him nervously; he held up the peace sign and muttered a greeting of "Yo,"

Next to him the boy's heart monitor sped up a bit, and his breathing. But it only lasted a moment before calming down.

Larxene walked in at that point, her usually slicked back hair falling messily around her eyes, she had a band aid on her cheek and bandages were winding up one arm, overlooking these details; she was fine. Riku's phone had started buzzing again and he was talking quickly into it, he hopped up from his chair and sat on the edge of the boy next to Roxas' bed, playing idly with his long strands of silver-white hair, almost lovingly. Meanwhile hissing angrily into the receiver.

Larxene had a half eaten biscuit hanging from between her teeth and was wearing a pair of torn up jeans and a pink sweater, which left Roxas very confused. Only for a moment though, as Marluxia and Naminè sidled in behind her, explaining while his violent bitchy sister was wearing pink.

When Larxene spoke, it was as if Roxas were the only one there;

"Mom's… getting treatment for some mental… things. I'm not sticking around. Go stay with Sora or something…" she looked a little shell-shocked and weak, but she had meant what she said, he knew that. Roxas nodded, and on seeing this, she left without a backward glance, Marluxia and Naminè following obediently behind her.

"Alright I'm fucking here already!!" they heard shouted in the hallway, at the same time Riku flipped his phone shut. "Larxene… what're you doing in the hospital?" came the voice again, partially curious.

"Get out of my way, **Zexion**," she said pushing past him vigorously.

A silver-haired boy entered and then a moment later a girl with the same shade of hair came into the room, she was wearing a lot of leather and an apathetic expression, a girl with orange-blonde hair with beads braided into it was attached to her arm.

Four kids, all with silver hair, what're the chances?

Whatever the case, the only one who looked pleased was the one lying unconscious on the bed, life support machine beeping away pleasantly in the background.

_And I want to wake up with the rain  
Falling on a tin roof  
While I'm safe there in your arms  
So all I ask is for you  
To come away with me in the night  
Come away with me_

Saïx sighed, his fingers drummed impatiently against the arm rest of the couch where less then twenty minutes ago he' d been grinding into the…

And now, _now_ he was listening to Norah Jones and his parents chatting animatedly to his teacher. They were both sitting opposite the teacher/student duo on armchairs, sipping on their champagne and humming to the soft melodies. Saïx ground his teeth and kept darting his eyes anxiously around the room making sure nothing was too out of place.

"So, Xemnas, do tell! What has our little-"Saïx twitched "Saïx been learning lately,"

The youngest of those present suddenly had a coughing fit, trying very hard not to laugh.

He shot Xemnas a look that said '_Go on sir; tell them what you've taught me_. _I _dare _you.'_

Xemnas seemed to realize the boy's train of thought and decided to change the topic.

Another hour of small talk passed, and much to Saïx's disappointment it was mainly about him. He didn't join the conversation at all except for at one point when his parent's had asked what he had planned for the next term, he had replied with a quick '_I'm planning to join the master debate team_'. Xemnas had choked on his wine. His father had blinked a few times and his mother simply smiled and said that she was '_so proud_'.

Xemnas glanced at the clock on the wall for the hundredth time that evening.

"Oh no," he said softly. "I should have left half an hour ago, I have to make a phone call by 9:30." He shuffled uncomfortably, not the best excuse, but it would do. Saïx just smirked.

It didn't take long for Mr. and Mrs. Lunar to get the idea and the waved him off before returning inside, away from the chilling late autumn breeze moving the tree's.

Saïx wasn't so willing to let the other leave, he trudged down the narrow path to the drive way next to the other, his arms crossed over his striped shirt, the sleeves fell past his hand and spared them from the cold, his jeans were getting slightly damp at the hems from trudging through the dew-laced grass which stung his bare feet. The two remained silent till they reached the older's black Nissan Skyline. He unlocked it with the press of a button and slid his way in, turning it on and winding down the window. He had parked beneath the big tree outside, he always did this, and Saïx's parents wouldn't have been able to see the car door from the windows of the house. It came in handy.

"Goodnight sir." Saïx said, leaning into the window. Xemnas cringed at the title he had been given, as though, for some reason, it hurt him.

"Goodnight," he spoke softly; moving his lips onto the others ever so casually. They stayed like that longer than usual; mouths pressing against one another's. Eventually they parted and Saïx took a step away from the car and raise a hand in goodbye as the car reversed, straightened up and drove off down the street, rounding the corner faster than it usually would.

The cerulean haired boy leant himself against the tree and slumped down it, sitting at the base. He shut his eyes for a while, exhaustion tempting to make him fall asleep right there. On re-opening his eyes they came level with the house across the road.

_Well… Good evening Demyx. Just getting home? Yes, I can see you, stop __**staring**__ Blondie._

A/N Thanks to anyone who bothers reviewing and to Dan for editing.

Random song exerts, I just picked lyrics from songs that came on when I was writing the certain parts.

_Madi don't leave – PlayRadioPlay_

_No cars go – Arcade Fire_

_Camisado – Panic at the disco_

_Come away with me – Norah Jones (Yeah, I don't know either) When Norah came on I was like, oh right, don't forget Saïx. God knows why Saïx and Norah Jones are linked in my head._

-Marawr.

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	3. I'm So Sick

* * *

A/N Yo, this'll be subject to rating changes, as most FF's on this site are

_**A/N Yo, this'll be subject to rating changes, as most FF's on this site are. **_

_**Also, this chapter is more of a filler chapter, giving information about characters and what not, feel free to skip and be very confused in chapter 4. Have a nice day.**_

_**R+R please.**_

_--_

_I'm so sick,  
Infected with where I live  
Let me live without this_

Rikku had a light blonde/brown/orange shade of hair, confusing when you tried to define it. She had green eyes and a fetish for scarfs, at least, she wore them all the time if that was anything to go by. Her eyes were a blinding emerald.

Another accessory of hers was the silver haired girl who she always managed to attach herself to.

The silver haired girls name was Paine.

"_So your name's Pain huh?" said a nervous looking blonde girl, playing with her hair nervously._

"_Yeah, Paine__, as in painful, torturous__." Said the other, standing stiffly, voice an overwhelming monotone. _

"_Oh, that's… um… cute… I think?" said the blonde with a shy glance to the ground. _

"_What do you want?" Paine said, in an agitated voice, foot tapping on the cement flooring._

_Rikku let out a maniacal sounding laugh, as if Paine had just said something immensely hilarious, said girl raised an eyebrow. Rikku coughed._

"_Would you go with me to the movies?" she asked quickly, hoping that the question wouldn't earn her a swift reply of a fist to her jaw._

_But the older was too shocked to even think of doing such a thing._

They ended up somewhat inseparable, as cliche as it may sound, knowing almost everything about one another.

Rikku still had one final secret, and she wouldn't tell it without a fight. Demyx, her brother, insisted ferociously that she should tell her love. But she wouldn't, she couldn't.

Besides. What did doctors know anyway?

Nothing.

_Empty bliss,  
Selfishness  
I'm so sick_

* * *

_Lately, I've been needing your help badly_

_Lately, I need someone to walk me home_

_Lately, all I get is storms and fevers_

_Lately, I feel lost, I feel lost._

Saïx's own breath seared his throat as he drew it. He sat on the middle of his bed, brow creased in frustration, eyes shut in a lame attempt to calm himself down. Demyx had seen. Why Demyx? Why not his stupid ex? No one would believe her if she told people. Some petty kind of revenge or something. It wasn't like Xemnas was a paedophile was it? _No _Saïx told himself, _he just has a Lolita complex or something. Yes, _he nodded to himself that would be it.

Demyx was a pretty little thing, green eyes, impish smile and cute as a button. But with a mouth the size of Tifa's tits, which was, if you knew said barmaid, an incredible feat. Saïx smiled to himself at that. He was always so good at analogies. Right.

Then he remembered he was in a bad mood and took his anger out his the unfortunate pillows.

While he was creating a feather cyclone his mobile, placed precariously on the very edge of his bedside table started to hum, the vibrations pushing it off the edge. He pounced on it, ending up twisted up on the floor, but with his phone wedged between his shoulder and his ear.

"Mmph?" he answered it.

"It's me," replied the velvet smooth voice. Saix rolled his eyes. Only one person bothered to call him. Of course it was Xemnas.

"Okay," said saix and without thinking he hung up his phone, only to have to pick it up a moment later.

"Yes?" he answered it.

"Was there a point to that?" Xemnas asked in a patronising tone. Saïx huffed and hung up again. Mentally slapping his own forehead, not being bothered enough to hit it himself. His phone wrong a third time.

"Next time you hang up I'm not returning the call." Xemnas said promptly. "Honestly, you're acting like that first year girl, Selphie."

Saïx remained quiet.

Xemnas sighed softly. "Did that boy notice?" he asked.

"What boy?" Saïx asked after a pause, chewing on his lower lip.

"The one across the street from your house."

Saïx didn't reply and Xemnas sighed again. But then he had to ask "What will happen to you if he says anything?"

"Don't worry about it," he said. But there was no smile to his voice.

Saïx hung up, went straight to his phone book and hit "_D_" and called the first number on the list.

It rung a few times before a bright voice answered. "Hey Sai. What's happening?"

"What did you see?" Saïx hissed through his teeth.

"Huh?" Demyx said, shocked.

"Last night. What did you see?"

"What are you talking about Saïx, it was a hot car is all… Something wrong?"

"Yes." Saïx said before hanging up. He pulled his arm back and pelted the phone against the wall, the screen detaching from the keys

Demyx never was any good at lying.

_Lately, I feel lost, _

_I feel lost._

* * *

_Missed me, missed, me now you've got to kiss me.  
If you kiss me, mister, you must think I'm pretty._

Demyx, after huffing indignantly, put his phone down, turned his music back up, and leant backwards on his chair, caressing the sleek guitar in his arms as if it were a child or a precious loved one. He strummed along to the guitar-less song playing with a tuneless hum, fingers tripping over the strings easily.

_  
__If you think so, mister, you must want to fuck me.  
If you fuck me, mister, it must mean you love me. _

He wondered silently to himself, was his English teacher really a…

A…

No, of course not. Saïx had been getting tutoring for a good year now.

Shit.

__

If you love me, mister, you would never leave me  
it's as simple as can be!

* * *

_Oh now I do recall, we were just getting to the part  
Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick.  
I hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention.  
Now let's not get selfish,_

Kairi was a pretty girl, Roxas had decided, but goddamn, she didn't give up did she? Roxas had been pulled away from his new red-headed friend, Axel, and into a family friendly mini-van belonging to Sora's mother, Tifa.

Now sitting lightly between Riku, Sora's best friend, with whom he had, had many fight's, and who he had, very happily (And very, very accidentally, of course) almost drowned, the last time they met. On his other side was Kairi, his cousin Sora's girlfriend, chattering away, in a loud thought intruding voice. So what if it sounded like wind chimes? Even wind chimes got annoying after twenty minutes of straight spiel, not even stopping for a breath. Was she human? No.

Nothing this evil was human. Sora, for once in his entire life, was silent, gazing at Roxas with a sort of bemused expression. The boy he was staring at, the centre of his attention, was in turn staring away from his cousin's eyes and out the window, watching the scenery fly past. He leaned across Riku, who squirmed uncomfortably, and pressed the button to let the window down, biting down on his tongue to stop from smiling when Riku got a faceful of silver hair. Roxas and Sora were quiet for the rest of the trip, silently staring, silently avoiding one another's gaze.

And the wind chimes kept chiming.

_Did you really think I'd let you kill this chorus?_

* * *

_A/n + __**Tifa has a super doper minivan, and the windows can be opened, don't question it, just believe –wink-. Also, don't get me wrong, I love Riku, and Kairi at times. I'm not bashing them on purpose, it's just happening.**_

_**Cheers Dan –Heart-**_

_**REVIEWS PLEEEEASE**_


	4. Breath

/N sorry the beginning of this is so sudden, I did warn you though

_**/N sorry the beginning of this is so sudden, I did warn you though. Also, this chapter sorta centers around Rikku/Paine. The next few might. Just a warning, yeah?**_

_  
__I wanna hear it  
Wanna hear you breathing_

_Were all addicted to something  
That takes away the pain_

_Me and you and my medication_

Rikku held out a thermometer in front of her eyes. _Wow _she thought _that's a little higher than it needs to be_. She scowled at it, shook it a bit and watched as the temperature slowly decreased, she smiled to herself. _Good thermometer, _she told it. She placed it down on the sink basin's side before carefully taking 3 pills from a little glass container on the bench. She filled a glass of water for herself, and just as she was about to take the pills her phone rung.

"Oh!" she voiced, placing the cup down and searching her pockets for her mobile. "Hello?" she asked it.

"Hey honey. Wanna come with me to ice skating?" asked Paine's monotonous voice through the phone.

"Hmmm," Rikku began, mocking the other. "I'm sure I can fit it in,"

"I thought you would," Paine said, Rikku could almost hear her roll her eyes. "I'll pick you up in about an hour," and she hung up.

"Oh," she said again, hanging up and rushing off to her bedroom to get ready, forgetting almost instantly about the pills.

_Me and you and my medication_

_Try not to make a sound  
Cause your eyes aren't open  
I'll just wait till your awake_

Sora's house was huge, the big, _i-have-rich-parents-and-hot-damn-it-shows_, kind of house. The ceilings were high, and the furnishing prices even higher. Roxas' room alone was that of three of the rooms in his old house smashed together. _His old house. His home. _Wow, he hadn't even cried… Had he?

Sora had watched carefully as his new house mate walked awkwardly into his new room. _Everything was so new_. Roxas look around; _wow _he thought _I'm on suicide watch. _Nothing sharp in sight, in a way that was oh-so painfully obvious. No ropes or long curtains. _No syringes filled with morphine, lots and lots of morphine. Always, __**always**__ the morphine. _No wonder he was on suicide watch. He shut his double doors and flicked the lock in, ambling slowly to the king sized bed in the centre of the room, headboard against the wall. Roxas had had a water bed at his old house. He was definitely going to miss it. He flopped down on his new bed, curling up onto his side and staying like that, letting the non-existent tears spill from his brilliant blue eyes.

_I feel the weight of your chest.  
Rise and fall with every breath_

_Theres a stain on my hand, and its red  
Oh my god, am I losing it?!  
I cant help what I've done or I've said  
It's the button i push, when it says  
Hand of Blood!_

Rikku coughed, holding a handkerchief to her mouth, noticing –_and ignoring­_- the specks of blood that traced it, stuffing it into her pocket. The silver haired girl wrapped a pale comforting arm around her.

"Did you catch Yuna's cold?" she asked in a concerned voice. Rikku hesitated a moment, looking into the other's eyes. She looked away, suddenly interested in the garbage truck zooming down the street.

"Yeah?" she said uncertainly. That was what was wrong. And then she repeated the word, with more defiance this time.

"Do you want to go home? Ice skating might be pushing it… just a bit," she said, letting out an airy laugh. Rikku stomped down her foot playfully.

"Oh hells no!" she said brightly. "I am not missing out on this, I've never even been."

Paine's mouth formed a perfect 'o'. "No. Way." She said, pushing the other more hurriedly in though the door clearly marked '_pull_'.

Rikku's feet were a good five sizes smaller than the others and she slipped up at least once every two minutes and her cold seemed to get worse and worse by the hour, she coughed more frequently and had to hastily wipe the blood onto the insides of her coat. Smiling reassuringly at the other **every single time**.

They were some of the last few on the ice but neither showed any want to leave; they circled the dome in a continuous circle, hands clutched tightly in one another's.

"So, Demyx is trying to get a band together?" Paine asked, lightly tracing circles on the back of the other's hand.

"Yeah, but he's failing miserably," Said Rikku, stumbling slightly. "No one else plays anything."

"Yuna can sing, you could tell him that," she said almost helpfully.

"Sure," Rikku said absentmindedly, small talk was definitely not her thing. Especially not with the headache that had her head pounding and what made her bite her tongue to stop from screaming out.

The pain, the _fucking pain_.

_Paine. _She said that name over and over in her head. It kept her sane. She could cope anything as long as she had the other.

She looked up at the taller, who was still talking, and tried to smile. But just as she did a searing pain washed over her, forcing her eyelids shut and her knees to the ground.

"Ri-Ri, are you alright? It's slippery, huh?"

"Yeah, sure is," she said, trying to add a half convincing giggle to the end. Failing.

"Did you hurt yourself?" Paine queried, sliding carefully to her knee's. Rikku gave her a thumbs up.

"Nah, I'm abso-fucking-lutetly perf--," she began, a dry, wicked sounding cough interrupting her mid-sentence. She swallowed back the blood.

"Ri-ri?"

"Perfect," she finished, fishing out a bottle of little blue pills from her pocket and dry swallowing three.

"Rikku, what's happening—?"

"Hey, you two alright?" called one of the other few skaters still sliding around. Rikku stood up and grinned casually at the boy.

"Fine thanks," she then turned to Paine. "c'mon Paine, I just tripped is all."

"Like fuck you did!"

"Paine, calm down."

"What the fuck were those pills?" she asked in a soft agitated mutter, still kneeling on the ice.

"Just Advil," said Rikku. Paine stood up and pulled the much smaller girl to her. Rikku's heart was beating a mile a minute, a slick sheen of sweat layered her body, regardless of how cold it was. But still, she held her same painful smile. _Pain, pain, why does it hurt so much??_

"What's going on, why won't you tell me?"

"There's nothing to say," she said, wincing at how pathetic she found herself sounding. "It was just a headache, I promise,"

"Let's go,"

"But, this is so nice—,"

"Please Rii," Paine begged. Rikku flinched but unraveled herself from the other and began to skate tentatively towards the front desk to hand in her skates.

When they got back to Rikku's house Paine stormed away from Rikku, that is, as soon as she had tucked the girl away safely in her bed. She pushed into Demyx's room, her lips set in a hard line. He was tuning his sitar, guitar and violin, each was laid out on his dark blue bed spread except for the guitar which he was holding lightly.

"Hey Paine, parents are out, feel free to do-" he glanced up at her from his guitar "whatever you two normally do at night, I won't listen, I'm busy. Use protection etcetera."

She stuttered a bit.

"Demyx," she choked out, worry contorting her voice. "What's wrong with her?"

He looked up at her again. Anxious now.

"What happened?" he asked, protective anger suddenly flaming up in his voice.

She went to reply but the older boy was already pacing down the hall and into his sister's bedroom. So she followed.

"Rikku," he gasped on seeing her. "ONE! Are you alright TWO! Why… why the fuck haven't you told her yet??"

"Told me what?" Paine asked softly from the door, leaning on its frame.

"Nothing. I just had a headache."

"You claim that you fucking love her Rikku. If you loved her you'd tell her that you were dy--," he gasped and ended the word shamefully. "—ing,"

"I… FUCKING… Demyx, GET OUT." Rikku screeched, happy façade eliminated. He left the room, head hanging. Rikku took two heavy, deep, exasperated breaths to calm herself.

"It's okay," said Paine, breathing rapid and heavy. "It… It was just a headache," she sat down next to the other. "Y-y-y-your not. You can't be… It was, it was only a headache! Right?" she demanded, gripping her hands together as they shook.

Rikku smiled sweetly. "Of course."

_I dont wanna feel my heart is breaking,  
Hand Of Blood!  
I dont wana see my life is burning._

_**A/n**_

_**Thanks for editing Mr. Igan.**_

_**PLEASE REVIEW!!**_


	5. Goodnight Kisses

_**If you hadn't figured it out yet, timing in this is gonna be a little random, try and keep up. Sorry.**_

_Cover up with make up in the mirror  
Tell yourself it's never gonna happen again  
You cry alone and then he swears he loves you._

Olette was a pretty little thing, big, almond shaped eyes, blindingly green. Her hair, hued chocolate brown in colour, fell just below her shoulders and spilled down in ringlets. She had pale skin, but it was perfect, smooth and fragile. Her smile was bright and, Namine swore, it could make birds sing. She wore a blue beaded bracelet, a gift from her dead father, and a necklace with a single blue stone hung from it. She wore bright clothes, oranges and yellows.

But the eyes turned red. Her hair limp and boring. Her skin changed to black's and blues. Her smile frowned. The necklace was broken. And her attire turned black.

The birds died.

_Face down in the dirt she says, this doesn't hurt she says I finally had enough.._

_What if I fell to the floor? _

_couldn't tail this anymore, _

_what would you do, come, _

_break me down,_

The lights were dim in her room, her cherry coloured lips were dry and chapped, but held the smile she had learnt to keep. The silver haired girl sat beside her, eyes cast downwards, lower lip shaking, her quivering fingers interlocked with the other girls.

"C'mere," said the little one, in a soft but defiant voice. The older obliged but kept her eyes to the floor. "Why are you shaking so much, you look so scared Paine, I really don't like it, It's not like you."

"Sorry Ri-Ri," said the other before biting down on her lower lip, reddening it as the blood rose.

"Smile… wouldn't you? You look so pretty when you do, you know that right. So, so, so, so, so pretty." The other pleaded. "For me," she added "I promise I won't tell anyone I saw you do it." She said with a half strength wink, somewhere outside a broken voice screamed something into what was probably a pillow. "C'mon, please, see, I'm smiling, you can do it too," her voice was hoarse, but still managed to bubble with life. The other choked on a sob, trying to stifle it and then, let her shaking lips pull up into a painful smile. _Paine, as in painful, torturous._

"Now kiss me you slut," the other order, in an alarmingly loud voice. Paine leant down, her lips shaking uncontrollably. She swallowed hard and choked on another sob before letting her lips press lightly against the others, so lightly, as though she thought that Rikku might shatter if she pressed down with any more pressure. She pulled back, reluctantly, as though that kiss was the only thing keeping her breathing. Rikku sighed contently and let her eyes shut. "I love you," she muttered. The silver haired girl returned the pledge and gripped more tightly to the others hands.

"You're hurting me a little there honey," she giggled a wheezing laugh. Paine released her tight grip. But only a little bit. "Do… Would you tell me a story…"

"Promise you won't fall asleep while I do," Paine stuttered.

"I promise," she said happily, eyes still closed.

" 'kay, once upon a time there was a princess, she was unbelievably beautiful, she had golden locks which fell almost all the way down her back… Oh fuck it Rikku, I can't do this…"

"No, I like it, please, continue"

"Her name was Rik… Rianne, she had big green eyes and breasts the size of watermelons…"

"Owie, poor girl,"

"Yeah, her life was so full of tragedy," Paine said, rolling her eyes, hands shaking more violently. "She lived on a big flying castle with her prince, Gippppp—uh, George."

"That's a stupid name, I don't like this story, and boys suck."

"It—It'll get better honey, I promise."

"Good," Rikku said lightly, lips curling up into a smile instead of the pout that had claimed them.

"On the castle was a servant, her name was… Penny, she had fallen in love with the princess… and um,"

"Did the princess love her back?"

"Wha--? Oh… yes, with all her heart…"

"I thought so,"

"One day they couldn't, uh, couldn't keep living that way and, er, they,"

"They ran away together, didn't they?"

"Yes,"

"Did they live happily ever after?" Rikku asked almost eagerly. Paine kept smiling even as the corners of her eyes started burning.

"You bet, for ever and… and…"

"Ever, free to love each other till the end of time."

There was a long silence and Paine let her eyes shift from the others rosy lips down to the scratched up floorboards.

The tears from the corners of Paine's eyes leaked down her cheeks, but she kept smiling. Even as the chest next to her ceased to rise and fall. "Night honey," she whispered lightly, placing a kiss atop the others lifeless lips and she left.

_Bury me, bury me_

_hearts dont break they bend  
and scars dont close they mend  
so how you feel about that_

Demyx kept his face pressed into the fabric encasing his pillow. He lifted his head up weakly and stared at the cushion. He heard the front door slide shut quietly and knew. He paused, took a deep shuddering breath and lifted the cordless phone sitting on his bedside up to his eye level. He punched in eight numbers, put it to his ear and waited.

"Hello?" a voice asked.

"Zexion," Demyx breathed softly.

"Oh, hey," Zexion said awkwardly. "How can I help?"

"I know… I know that right now you hate me more than anything or anyone." He paused for a short while, Zexion didn't object to the statement so he continued. "But you're my best friend,"

"Oh... Am I?"

"Yeah – and I really sorta need you here. Now." Demyx said, running a free hand through his hair.

"I'm kinda," Zexion paused and Demyx swore he could feel the others embarrassment.

"Please,"

"I'm doing something right now, I'll be around in ten, Paine should be back soon… then Riku won't be here alone." He explained.

"Whatever you're making. It better taste like heaven." Demyx murmured angrily.

"Don't worry, it will," Zexion said, and Demyx could hear him smile.

_maybe in your silent slumber so surreen so insecure  
the color in your face begins to disapate so soft _

_The red poison of your lips  
The red poison of your eyes  
Is where I kissed the blood from_

When Paine got back to her house Riku was on his mobile, chatting away to Sora and Zexion was sitting in front of the oven, seemingly waiting for some cookies to finish baking, the house phone resting lightly to his side. Why was everyone so obsessed by those things?

"I'm going to bed guys…" she said aloud. "Night. Love you," Zexion flinched, but returned the vow and Riku blew her a somewhat awkward kiss between words on his phone.

She wandered into her bedroom and opened the wardrobe, dropping to her knees she pulled out a shoe box, opening the lid and pulling out a sleek black shining painkiller. She checked the barrel. Three, that was two more than she needed.

"_Forever and ever and ever and ever,_" she mumbled, releasing the safety catch. She muttered it over and over and over again, placing the cool metal to her temple casually and letting her finger catch on the trigger.

_Up to my neck  
When I'm breathing without you  
Without you  
Up to my eyes  
And I'm seeing without you_

Let me apologize to begin with,  
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say,  
But trying to be genuine was harder than it seemed,  
But somehow I got caught up in between.

Five minutes prior

Riku, moments after being dropped off at his house by Tifa, swiped his mobile from his pocket, punched in Sora's number and hit 'call'. He was greeted with an overjoyed response.

Yeah. Right.

"Didn't, we just drop you off?" Sora asked in suprising monotone.

What was up with you today?" Riku asked, he didn't wait for a reply. "I still think you should tell her,"

Sora sighed. Most audibly.

"I don't think I should," said the other.

"What am I? Your plaything?" Riku fired back. Sora sighed again.

"Something like that," he said. Riku's breathing hitched momentarily.

"I hate you," he cursed.

"Then why does it matter?" said the other trying to sound strong even as his voice broke on the last word. Riku smirked.

"You really don't like hearing that do you?"

"Are you bi-polar?" Sora queried.

"Something like that," Riku said, choosing to steal one of the other's lines. Riku glanced upwards for a moment, his sister stood at the door. Her eyes red and watery, she looked like she had no clue as to where she was, and this made her brother slightly worried. But then she spoke. Something about going to sleep. Riku nodded.

"Why'd you stop yelling?" Sora asked, as though he'd been enjoying it.

"Somethings up with my sister," he said airily.

"Wanna go check on her? She might do an Ienzo,"

"Don't say that and nah, it's cool, she's probably just having another fight with--."

And then the world shattered in the wake of one single shot.

**A/N**

**Thanks for the edit Dan**

**More thanks to any reviewers and Alerts**

**Dan: She really shouldn't be thanking me… This stuff is giving me ideas, so it should be the other way around.**

**REVIEWS would be really nice, please. **


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